The Best of SPAM

For the past few days the Unaccomplished Angler blog has been flooded by a sudden torrent of SPAMMERS. I always get an occasional SPAM message in my comments queue, but this past week the volume has skyrocketed (I probably need to change the filter in my SPAM filter). Apparently the SPAM nation heard that I had been called back to active blog duty and wanted to throw me an unretirement party, complete with discounted Viagra, Topsy Turvy Tomato Plants and Pajama Jeans.

Not to worry, I can sniff out a rat so there’s no threat of these lowlife miscreants running amok in the comments section. I’ve often pondered the reasoning behind the mind of a SPAMMER and concluded long ago that their sole intent is to make life difficult by wasting our time. Well, if their intent was to annoy me, they failed miserably. I actually find these quite amusing, and in fact, worthy of sharing.

Just want to say your article is striking. The clearness in your post is simply spectacular and i can take for granted you are an expert on this field. Well with your permission allow me to grab your rss feed to keep up to date with forthcoming post. Thanks a million and please keep up the effective work. ???????????? ??????????? ??????

Note to SPAMMER: Your command of the English language is almost pretty good, but not quite.  And 29 question marks is a bit excessive, don’t you think???????????? ??????????? ?????? I am, however, glad you enjoyed my effective work.

Hello everyone. I was just surfing the Internet for fun and came upon your website. Terrific post. Thanks a lot for sharing your experience! It is good to know that some people still put in an effort into managing their websites. I’ll be sure to check back from time to time.

Note to SPAMMER: Who is everyone? It’s just me, here– the Unaccomplished Angler.

Thank you for this blog.  Thats all I can say.  You most definitely have made this blog into something thats eye opening and important.  You clearly know so much about the subject, youve covered so many bases.  Great stuff from this part of the internet.  Again, thank you for this blog.

Note to SPAMMER: First you said, “Thank you for this blog. Thats all I can say”. But then you went on to say more than that.Just sayin’.

I assumed it was likely being some unexciting old report, nevertheless it definitely compensated for my time. I most unquestionably will post a link to this article on my web page. I am convinced my visitors are planning to find that realistically helpful.

Note to SPAMMER: I am glad to have provided compensation for your time, which must be very valuable to you. By the way, nobody here talks the way you do.

This is such a great resource that you are providing and you give it away for free. I love seeing websites that understand the value of providing a quality resource for free. Thanks for this great resource!

Note to SPAMMER: You’re welcome!  It’s actually better than free because you also get USD $8.5M. All you have to do is provide your mailing address and I will send you a cashier’s check from my offices here in Nigeria.

Im happy I located this blog page, I couldnt obtain any knowledge on this subject before. I also operate a site and in case you are ever serious in doing some guest writing for me please feel free to let me know, im always look for people to check out my site. Please stop by and leave a comment sometime!

Note to SPAMMER: Your not the only won whose happy you located this blog page- Im happy two! Ill be shure too stop by your blog page and leave a comment sometime!

Hey there, was just surfing through the internet looking for some information and came across your blog. I am impressed by the info that you have on this page. It shows how well you get this subject. Bookmarked this blog, will come back for more. You are awesome. Mucho love from arbeitsrecht wiesbaden

Note to SPAMMER: Thank you for acknowledging that I get this subject. Me, awesome?  You’re awesomer! Mucho love back atcha, Spülungssack from Wiesbaden.

Aw, this was a really quality post. In theory I’d like to write like this too – taking time and real effort to make a good article… but what can I say… I procrastinate alot and never seem to get something done

Note to SPAMMER: You had me at “Aw”. And for what it’s worth, you’re the first procrastinating SPAMMER I’ve ever met.

Terrific piece of content, this is very similar to a site that I have. Please check it out sometime and feel free to leave me a comenet on it and tell me what you think. Im always looking for feedback.

Note to SPAMMER: Are you also an Unaccomplished Angler?  Kindred spirits! I shall soon to be leaving you a comenet on a very similiar site that you have.

Hi. I just noticed that your site looks like it has a few code errors at the very top of your website’s page. I’m not sure if everybody is getting this same problem when browsing your site? I am employing a totally different browser than most people, referred to as Opera, so that is what might be causing it? I just wanted to make sure you know. Thanks for posting some great postings and I’ll try to return back with a completely different browser to check things out!

Note to SPAMMER: Hi back at you and thanks for finding code errors at the very top of my website’s page. I looked but didn’t see any. I’m guessing that your Opera browser sucks.

hello it is my first post on this website and to start with I would like to thank for the great quality information, which I were able to find in this and all previous posts , it really helped me a lot. I will definitely add this blog on my google reader ;) Also, I would like to ask – don’t you mind if I will quate some information from your website since I am writing articles for the Associated Content, Ezine and other articles directories (this is my part time job)? It would really help me with some of mine articles. Of course, I will mention your blog name or URL (not all articles directories allows URL’s , so I can’t 100% promise that you will get a direct link to your blog).

Note to SPAMMER:  I don’t mind if you will quate some information from my website. Quate away.



8 Comments

  1. Foul Hook

    This is hilarious… But don’t quate me on that.

    • Kirk Werner

      Actually, Foul Hook, you’re quite quatable.

  2. Dave

    See, this is proof positive that these people have wayyyyy too much free time on their hands. Not to mention, the fact that they are way to busy to personalize. I get so much of this same crap to the office email here. Lemme tell ya, some of them I get a real kick out of. For example… Dear Guaranteed Winner We are Pleased to inform you that your email have won a prize money of £800,000.00 GBP. HAHAHA.. So, let’s see at the current exchange rate, that’s roughly $1.3 mil USD. Not that I couldn’t use it, mind you, but let me get my account info so you can take my last $0.25. That way the next email reads £800.000.16 GBP
    And of course with Craigslist… Dear Customer, Craiglist online department temporary disabled your account. Yeah, right, but I can log in! What’s the problem? And no I’m not following your bogus link.
    Last but not least… Dear PayPal Member, This one really cracks me up. So, I’ve not had an open PayPal account in the last 10 years. So, I’m really gonna A) remember the login and password B) have any money in there for you to take, and C) gonna give you the pleasure.
    With all this talk about the subject, reminds me of… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g8huXkSaL7o

    Keep them lines tight Kirk
    I’ve had 32 winter unicorns on the hook since the 3rd week of December, landed 12. But who’s counting.

    Dave

    • Kirk Werner

      Dave, I’m counting. And you suck 😉 Solid work!

  3. cofisher

    The unretired, unaccomplished Angler has done it again! I thought I had a lot of readers. Instead it turns out that they’re spammers. OMG!

    • Kirk Werner

      Cofisher,

      In addition to being unretired and unaccomplished, I am also unselective- I’ll take whatever comments I can get!

  4. Chuck

    What is the motivation of these people? What do they get out of doing this?

    • Kirk Werner

      Makes you wonder, eh? I think they must get paid 50 cents a week to write spam…

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